What to do what to do?
Man oh man, I have been rethinking this whole college job thing. It's a job yes! It will barely get us by though. I don't think I will be able to put ANY money away and am really going to be living pay check to pay check...I know that's the American way but fuck! If the oil place offers me a job, I think I will take that. It will get us back on our feet faster in hopefully out of this shithole state. No offense to the residents of Maryland...but I really fucking hate it here!
Sure I will be working shifts and what not but I will be making more money and trying to move ahead instead of being stuck here. I am so pissed at myself today! I am a perpetual fuck up and would consider myself a failure up to this point in my life. I have zero to show for anything of 28 years of existence on this planet!
I get so pissed when I talk with freinds back home and hear about them planning on buying houses and getting toys. Not to mention going on vacations and shit! My family deserves that stuff to. I am the one that should be providing that to them. Am I? Not even fucking close! FUCK!
Or I can tough it out at the college and have quite a few lean years ahead of me hoping that it will all work out for me in the end. What the fuck am I supposed to do? This college thing is decent but for what I am getting paid I am getting screwed. At least at the oil place I won't really be doing anything. But then college will be 100X harder to accomplish! I hate life sometimes. Wish things were just spelled out for me. Screw Robert Frost and the road less traveled BS!
Enough whining! I will keep you updated as soon as I know what the fuck I am doing. I start work tomorrow at the college! I am not as gung ho as one would imagine! I am a bitter asshole today! I can't believe they expect me to have a family on this type of pay! It boggles my mind!
posted by cackmandu at 1:20 PM
2 Comments:
That bites. I know the college doesn't pay well. They don't pay their professors well and they all must have Ph.D.'s. They aren't paid shit, but then again, when you compare what the college pays them and what is a national average - the pay sucks.
I think you need to define your ultimate goal. That was the only thing that helped hubby. Once he had that focus he knew where he had to go with it. He wanted to live in a rural area in a college town. he wanted job security. Those things equaled up to teaching. Teaching at the H.S. or lower level couldn't support a family and he didn't want ot work with kids. That left getting a Ph.D. to teach college.
Where do you want to live? What kinds of jobs are available there? Can you get that education here to set you up for a job out there? If you decide you want to forego education here and get the hell outta dodge - don't waste time. But - you may end up in a similar state of existence once you move. Better setting, same life.
You sound like you still aren't sure what your intent is - getting out of MD or getting a degree.
February 21, 2006 1:49 PM
I thought that this was going to be a wee bit better paying job. So far they have jewed me out of about $4,000 from when we first started talking money! There is no fucking way! As of right now I will be making excatly $20,000. I can't make it on that. If it was just me sure. Even if it was just me and my wife sure. With that pay there is no way, that I can see, of getting ahead. Sure the schooling will be next to nothing but I called admissions and they suggested I go CSM and finish up my AA and then go to them after that. Then I would have to take classes during the day. I would like to be able to have a degree within 5 years. Can I do it? I think so. I think I need some extra money to make that happen! What a life!
February 21, 2006 5:01 PM
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